Growing up I loved Diet Soda, Diet Pepsi to be more specific. I was only allowed to have it on special occasions and days when my grandparents came to visit called for Diet Pepsi. I would be excited all day knowing that later that day I would get to see two people who loved me more than I loved Diet Pepsi! I was lucky as a kid to grow up near my family. My other grandmother still lives in the same town as my parents, my grandparents lived in Santa Clara which seemed farther away as a child riding in a car, than the 45-60 minutes driving as an adult. Our dining room table was in a front room in the house with a giant window that I was tall enough to stand in front of and wait for their car to arrive. I felt like I would stand there for hours waiting for my grandparents to arrive. One time in particular my mom reminded me of the common phrase "a watched pot never boils." She would make me do something else and eventually the dog would bark and I knew the moment had arrived and my grandparents were here!! I would run out the front door, usually barefoot, to give them both hugs, ask how the drive was and walk with them back inside.
My grandparents were married 61 years, exactly. A year ago this Sunday my grandmother passed away after having a stroke and further complications. A year ago I wasn't able to speak at her funeral. I couldn't find the strength to stand in front of a packed church full of friends and family members who loved and adored my grandmother to speak about the woman who had such a tremendous influence on my life.
My grandmother was full of compassion for others. She was constantly doing things for other people. As one of five grandchildren, I was continuously reaping the benefits. I know people say their grandmother's cooking was the best, or their grandmother's recipes were incomparable; but my grandmother made the best cookies. She was famous for her chocolate chip cookies. These were not your ordinary chocolate chip cookies. She would add several ingredients that would make her signature cookie! She would mail each grandchild a bag of cookies a few times a semester when we were away in college, I think she knew we'd have plenty of friends around while we had cookies in our room. I was fortunate enough to go to college in my home town and was able to go and spend the weekend with my grandparents. One Saturday afternoon we got out the cookie sheets and cooked until we ran out of supplies. I continue to make her cookies and think of the afternoons we would fill the kitchen with cookies and how my grandfather would wait with great expectation knowing there would be fresh cookies when he got home from playing tennis.
I think one of the things I am most grateful to my grandmother for is the way she raised my dad. Given that Father's Day is also on Sunday I will take a moment to praise a man who I love with all my heart. Thank you for teaching my dad the value of a dollar, he has passed this along to my siblings and me and begrudgingly I have been saving since 16! Thank you for teaching my dad how to love his family well. My dad coached every little league, soccer, and basketball team; if he happened to not be coaching he was certainly the loudest parent cheering in the stands. He always told us how much he loved us and was proud of us. After every heart break or disappointment he reminds me that he is always there for me and that I will accomplish everything I set my mind towards. I truly feel as if I am the luckiest girl in the world for having him as my dad.
I'm not sure which is harder: remembering all of the wonderful times together or thinking about all the moments I won't have my grandmother around for. I feel so incredibly blessed to have had twenty-three amazing years with my grandmother. She cared and loved me as if she was my own mother, but there was always something special about our time together. I don't know from first hand experience but I could imagine that the role of being a grandmother is similar to being a fairy godmother. Seeing my grandmothers growing up I was always excited knowing that I was going to be loved well and encouraged to chase my dreams. My grandmother always made it point to tell me how much she loved me and I can still hear her voice at the end of our conversations, I would say it first, "I love you Grandma" and she would say it back, "Love you." I'll never forget the way she said it, it wasn't in response to me saying it first, rather she said it as a fact. A fact that she would love me forever and always.
I hope as those moments come to pass without her by my side that I would continue to feel her love and be reminded of how proud she would be. My grandmother was kind and gave without expecting anything in return. I want to continue to live to serve others like my grandmother did.
I love you Grandma.
